When you and your spouse decide to get divorced, you are likely to get unsolicited advice from friends and family members. While most are done out of good intentions, they can sometimes do more harm than good. This is especially true for complicated issues like legal and financial matters. Most friends, furthermore, are not always objective and are likely to have an emotional connection to the situation.
Below are other reasons you should not take divorce advice from friends and family members:
- They are not aware of the facts and details about your marriage (although they think they do) – Regardless of how close you are with your friends, they don’t know everything about your situation. ; Even if you tell them, they still don’t know how to process financial or legal information objectively. ;
- They don’t know the laws regarding divorce – Unless your friend or family member practices divorce law, they will not fully understand the law. Divorce, furthermore, is complicated; it is more than about asset division and deciding who gets the custody of the children.
- They tend to compare divorces – No two divorces are alike. No two couples have the same marriage, assets, and properties. So what might work for them or their divorce might not work for you and vice versa.
Here are the five pieces of divorce advice you should ignore:
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It’s better to stay together for the sake of the kids.
Staying in an unhappy or abusive marriage can do your kids more harm than good. If you genuinely love and care for your children, you would not want them to see both their parents constantly arguing and fighting. Plus, if you want your kids to have happy and successful relationships in the future, you should provide them with the best example you can. A conflicted or a dysfunctional marriage cannot do that.
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Doing your own divorce can save you more money.
There can be plenty of divorce articles and resources, but you should know that family law is a complicated matter. It is still best to consult
a divorce attorney to protect your rights and have a better chance of getting the settlement you deserve. You should also know that A DIY divorce can only add more tension and stress if your relationship ended with fighting or conflict.
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Stop feeling sorry for yourself.
Divorce, for the most part, is sad and heartbreaking. It disrupts your routines, responsibilities, and relationships with other friends and families. It would help if you processed everything you’re going through to be able to heal. It’s okay to feel angry and devastated. Feeling sorry for yourself is an integral part of the grieving process. It can help you start the journey to move on.
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Get revenge or get even.
If you believe that your spouse’s behavior is the main reason for divorce, getting even can be tempting. Unfortunately, many acts of revenge can only backfire. It can also make your divorce more expensive and stressful, as it invites more hostility and resentment. Revenge, furthermore, can hurt your kids and prevent you from healing or moving on.
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Try to hide as many assets as you can.
Asset division is one primary concern among divorcing parties, with spouses worried about how the court will divide everything. If you have more assets and properties than your spouse and are considering hiding them, you might be in for some severe penalties. When
concealed assets are later discovered, you could face a hefty fine or jail time.
If you want your divorce case to ignore these pieces of advice. Be sure to only get in touch with an experienced family or divorce attorney to avoid costly mistakes.
